Lately it has been a challenge to write.
It used to be so easy.
The words…
The ideas…
Regularly found their way to the surface of my life.
Helping me better understand what I was thinking.
And feeling.
Not so now.
Now I feel like I have been marking time.
Waiting.
But not quite sure what I am waiting for.
The waiting is not some dark night of the soul.
Feeling lost.
Cast off.
Alone.
Rather, I think it is some type of discernment.
Figuring out who I am at this age and stage of my life.
Waiting
Sometimes patiently
Other times not
For my spirit to burn like it did before.
Telling me
This is it.
Now is the time.
Maybe that spirit burning will never happen again like it did before.
Maybe there is a new way for me to be which I have yet to discover.
If so, will I learn to be okay with that?
I don’t know.
What I know today is I miss it.
Grant says
May 1, 2019 at 9:39 pmYOU miss it? So do we all.🤔🙂
Virginia Ludeman says
May 2, 2019 at 10:43 pmPaul! I have a question for you: are you familiar with Spiritual Direction? The questions you are living with are strong urging for paying close attention, as you already recognize a process of discernment.
If you would like to know more about “what is Spiritual Direction” I would be happy to explore that with you as a step along the way of your discernment. You may already know someone with whom you would consider such a relationship.
Let me know if you would like to talk about this.
Ginger
Paul Alcorn says
May 6, 2019 at 3:19 pmThank you Ginger. I have not thought about a spiritual director, but will give the idea some thought….