You Make It By Walking

Shortly after my graduation from college I spent a month living in a contemplative retreat center just outside of Sedona, Arizona. In the worship space hung a banner with a figure in a monk’s habit and the words, “Pilgrim there is no way. You make it by walking.” As the time came for me to leave I sketched that figure and wrote those words on a scrap of paper which I folded up and put in my wallet. I carried that scrap of paper with me for years until the day it literally fell apart in my hands when I unfolded it to reread those words.

Pilgrim there is no way. You make it by walking.
Years ago I thought when I reached the age I am now and had been in parish ministry as long as I have I would have it all figured out.  
Ministry.
Life.
Who I am.
What I am to do.
Even though I now recognize the foolish of my youthful thinking, at times I still live with the sense that some how I am supposed to know, but the truth is I know less now than I thought I knew then. When I am rested and feel centered I can live with that “not knowing.” When I am tired and feel vulnerable that not knowing makes me feel anxious.

I think I need to redraw that figure from long ago and to rewrite those words and put them not in my wallet, but some place where I can see them everyday.  Maybe even see them multiple times each day because those words echo with a truth I need to hear. 

Pilgrim there is no way. You make it by walking.