As I get older I am more and more aware of my own mortality.
The ages of those whose lives are summed up in the obituaries come closer and closer to my own age. And, today the liturgy for Ash Wednesday reminds us From dust we came. To dust we shall return.
I understand that.
And, that will be, but…
The but is while I understand the dust to dust part. I am not sure I believe it.
I am not sure because I believe that life, even my life, came from something more than dust.
There was love.
And dreams.
And hope.
And intimacy.
And, I believe my life will go to something more than dust when I die.
The dust to dust part may be true for my body.
But I am not sure it is true of my life.
Do my dreams which already live in tomorrow live on in the tomorrow after that? Does the hope which sustains me today linger into tomorrow? Does love push past the boundaries of what we name as life and death?
I don’t know the how or the why,
But I believe my life and your life and all life taps into what I can only describe as Life with a capital “L.” That Something More which some call soul and others call spirit and I call ???? Maybe all this is just wishful thinking on my part. My own longing that my life will continue even after that moment when my body stops.
But, I sense it is true.
And so today will hold onto that as well as the smear of ashes across my forehead.